I have had an enduring couple of days with my head barely above the waves of depression that have been lingering around what’s left of my sanity.

And then they’re gone.

I am okay again.

I am left feeling relieved.

I have reached a state of equilibrium.

For now.

For some of us, reaching a state of ‘feeling okay’ is a fucking milestone.

I am one of those.

So when you ask me how I am, and with truth in my eyes, I answer “I am fine”, know that I hold on to that feeling so hard like one would hold a precious stone with their hands. 

It takes a lot of work for me to say “I am feeling okay”. Because most of my life, I am not.

It is not being ungrateful with the blessings I have been bestowed upon.

It is certainly not moaning.

It is simply an illness.